Living in Seclusion – A COVID-19 Battle
Living in Seclusion -
a COVID-19 battle
My 11-year-old said the other day, “In 50 years’ time, we will all be talking about what we did in the time of COVID”. Aside from an unbidden reflection, that some of us may not be here in 50 years’ time, which I kept to myself - his comment certainly captured the societal mood and moment. Each generation speaks of their defining moment, WWI, WWII, Vietnam or the Moon landing. “Where was I when JFK was shot?”, Woodstock, the Great Depression, economic recessions and the GFC, Princess Diana’s death, Kobe Bryant’s death – incidents and events that impacted or continue to impact our lives, in greater or lesser ways.
This current COVID-19 situation is a completely defining moment as its constraints reach into the intimacy and fabric of our everyday. We watch the daily struggles of politicians, epidemiologists, doctors and nurses the world over. We observe Italians singing on their balconies as they are forced into strict isolation protocols, sporting codes sidelined, death tolls rising and Apps which track the movements of populations overseas. We experience job losses, school closures and our daily existence shrink as we move to WFH (Working from Home), if we can still work. We socialise on Zoom or House party and embrace exercise outside the home, enthusiastically and with vigour. We can all recite the four reasons we are able to go out in our sleep. Our dreams are more vivid. Our shopping impacted. Our relationships impacted. We show our adaptability and our concern for community, as well as our struggle for survival. To a lesser or greater extent, we are all in this together.
As I write this, I have just received a notification that Queensland will lift some restrictions by next Friday and I know NSW will be returning children to their classrooms from May 11th. These notifications, contemplations and open conflict between Chief Health Officers and Politicians, State, Federal and international, are in some ways the most challenging to integrate into our daily life and thinking. For just as we have ordered and adjusted our everyday, the call to arms is given. And yet again as I write, I receive the notification that Tasmania and Victoria have recorded another COVID related death overnight. It remains difficult to gauge where in the continuum of moving into living in isolation or coming out of isolation we are.
Through the lens of my counselling screen, as we moved to offering counselling and therapy through Telehealth – I spent an exhausting, yet exhilarating week reflecting with clients on the impact on all aspects of life of Level 3 COVID-restrictions. Losses experienced as well as opportunities gained as we socially isolate, live under shelter or as I like to think of it, live under seclusion.
This experience provides a leveller for us, but also points to our resilience, adaptability and sense of entrepreneurship. By way of example, our local businesses supporting each other, our local coffee shops suddenly providing cooking classes, Easter egg making kits and breakfasts in home delivered boxes. Then there is the entrepreneurship we are showing in our lives, adapting therapy to online ways of interacting, support and change processes and the entrepreneurship of our clients in embracing new ways of living, effecting change and embracing life. People living with severe anxiety who in session are able to tell me how this experience actually is a normalising experience for them, and who are, through this recognition, able to be empathetic and compassionate to what everyone else is going through. Other people who are frustrated by what they describe as a holding pattern in the change process, suddenly seeing the opportunity of being to able to go to the gym remotely and choose the classes they want to do at their convenience. This enables them to continue with their change goals but in a different way. So many people overcoming fear and embracing the new.
So out of my learnings from my therapy with clients at this time of Stage 3 restrictions, our daily life formula is clear:
1) Define a Daily Purpose;
2) Doing Something for my Well-being
3) Doing Something Social (COVID-19 sanctioned), beyond your family group;
4) Doing Something Fun;
5) Doing Something Reflective;
6) Exercise/Nutrition/Hydration;
7) Something Future-focussed.
In this way we can use COVID-19 to maintain self, or to continue personal change processes and journeys, rather than to sit with the inevitable fear and frustration we are all experiencing.
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Renate Hoffmann is a Mental Health Social Worker and Family Therapist with over 20 years experience. She helps children, adults and couples navigate a path through life’s challenges and is highly skilled in a range of techniques to bring out client’s strengths. Renate is based at Port Phillip Psychology, Chelsea.